
Deadlines met and a new one ahead. One final push- I am officially reviewing the entire book in the next couple of weeks. It's written. Seriously. It's very exciting.
Also on my way to Seattle for a long weekend. While away, I am going to leave you with an article by Sarah. She's right, I do trust her to write for you so I will leave the intro, explaining the intent behind this post to her.
What I will say is that the inner critic is something we all have to find a way to cohabitate with, maybe even love? Why push against something that when embraced can transform us, making us grow and become better in ways we hadn't thought possible. The trick is finding your own way to embrace this little fellow and I really enjoyed reading about how Sarah has made peace with her Inner Critic.
The Inner Critic by Sarah Stevenson
When I first approached Marisa about writing a post for her blog, it was as part of an email to let her know that my new website would be going live and that I would love for her to take a look at it. As part of the email, I also asked if she would be interested in me writing a post for her readers called: Don’t Let Your 9 to 5 Steal Your Creativity. I almost deleted this portion of the email as, you see, I did not want Marisa to think that I was pushy or wanted yet another thing from her. My inner critic was loud and clear and it took me some time to figure out how to deal with it regarding writing this piece.
Consider this idea from Tara Mohr, a friend and life coach, “We are hardwired to have the voice of the inner critic. No matter, how good we are at something, how far along we are on our own creative journeys, or even how famous we are; the inner critic is alive and well inside us all. It is part of our safety, security and survival and is a device that is used by our brains to help keep us in our safety zone.”
So how as entrepreneurs and creatives do we learn to tackle the inner critic and use the inner critic to help propel our projects, business and creative lives into action?
First, you must give a name to your own inner critic. By naming the critic it will enable you to disarm it when it arises, helping to separate it from yourself. My critics name is Freddy Two-Tone. He is a creative type-wears tennis shoes, sweater and jeans and has a cape. I don’t know how the cape came about but I think it has something to do with being super man or expecting me to be super woman.
After naming the critic, you must also get to know it. What does it say to you about doing the work, or leaving your job to start your own creative business? Or launching into that next creative project? Who does the inner critic echo? For me it was a combination of an old boss and other people I had known throughout my creative career that always seemed to want to derail me or at least that is what I thought. In addition, he was the same age as I am now, so I could truly identify with my current situation as a new creative business owner.
Once you name and get to know your inner critic, what do you do then? You need to realize that the critic will always be with you but by being able to recognize the different voices that speak to you, you are able to determine who is in charge. Note here, YOU are always in charge not some crazy critic named Freddy Two-Tone. We need to also, realize that the inner critic is actually not the enemy but in fact someone we need to learn to coexist with and not fight. Freddy is cynical: a glass is half empty kind of guy; not at all how I am as a creative person or how I choose to live my own life. So, you see, the inner critic is not the same as our own best thinking but a voice created to question our own intentions and our own way of doing things.
Once we realize this and only then are we able to move into a relationship with our inner critic. One way of doing this is with humor. By saying something like: “Hi, inner critic...I hear you...?” or taking it by the hand and walking it out of the room, you are placing yourself back in control of the situation. While writing this piece, I had to literally, remove Freddy from my shoulder, say I can do this, I’ve got it covered and I’m going to the library to write, so please leave me to it! Otherwise, I would still be sitting at home with a blank page in front of me, wondering why I could not fill a page with words.
By doing this we are able to move to the final step of checking out what the inner critic is trying to tell you. What ever scenario you are questioning, don’t argue with the critic. Instead, ask yourself if what the voice is saying is true, and what you are most worried about in regard to the situation at hand. Learn to live lightheartedly with your critic and over time you will be able to say...”I’ve got this situation covered and I am going to be OK.” For me, it was saying, Marisa trusts me enough to write for her audience, I need to trust myself enough to know that I can write for her audience and what I have to say is funny and lighthearted and a step outside of my comfort zone. But I am willing to do it to share a message and to help others grow in their own creative journeys. So thanks Marisa, for trusting me and my inner critic and for having me share with you here today.
Sarah Stevenson is a registered interior designer who worked with some of the top design and architecture firms in Chicago. Like so many artists just starting out, she craved a challenging and collaborative environment -- one where her creative would blossom.
While she certainly worked on creative projects -- one of which was photographed by the the architectural photographer, Hedrich Blessing -- the long hours took their toll.
That’s why Sarah now dedicates her work to helping artists and creative people in all fields carve out space in their day. She helps them find time for their own creative explorations — no matter how many hours a week they work.
Sarah leads group explorations and founded the Create Explore Discover Art Retreat, an annual getaway that brings together women for creative workshops, fresh, local food and nature walks in the Lake Tahoe area. {note from Marisa - I really loved my time at this retreat, held for the first time last year. I highly recommend adding it to your 'retreats to attend' list. Sarah's opening registration June 1st!}
You can find more about her work at www.sarahgstevenson.com
thank you Sarah for sharing this with us.
'Love' the original is available here